Draco's Designers
by Orseis
Summary: Hogwarts is sponsoring a new program for 5th, 6th, and 7th years. Something about remodeling rooms, clothes, and makeovers. Dumbledore insists it's perfect for house unity. Will madness ensue when Draco is paired up with Ginny? - ON HOLD
1. Of Remembering Summers Passed

**A/N**: All right! I finally got this up. This is my first and a half Harry Potter fanfic. Yes. And a half. I didn't make any mistakes there. So this is called _Draco's Designers_. I have rather odd tastes in pairings. Draco/Ginny is a definite. I don't think I can handle two pairings at once though. By the way. This story will be put into the category of Humor/Romance in case you haven't noticed yet. And sorry for any grammer or spelling mistakes. I don't check this over. Just write and save.

**Background info: **There are quite a lot of changes from the book in this. The Gryffindor trio and Draco are in 6th year and apparently Ginny in 5th. But Sirius isn't dead. He's still very much alive. How could I kill him off? The rest will be explained in the story. I can't give too much away can I? –wink- Draco's dad is NOT in Azkaban…for the reason in the OotP that is. xD Ill try desperately hard to keep all characters in character. Sorry if they seem odd half the time.

I shall stop this blabbering and get on with the show! If anything sounds a bit out of place just tell me.

Note: You'll learn soon that I'm **_VERY_** random. That will be reflected a bit in my writing. I'm also extremely paranoid so if this is weird beyond reason, you were warned. D

Remembering Summers Passed-

Draco's POV-

It seemed like another perfect year for Potter. It was just the opposite with me. During the summer the Ministry of Magic had captured a large group of Death Eaters on one of their raids. Unfortunately for me, father had been one of the captured Death Eaters. Or maybe not so unfortunate. At least I was free from _one_ of the bumbling idiots of my life. And besides, he had been anything but gentle or loving with me. Some father he is.

Lucius Malfoy had immediately been sent to Azkaban prison. Mother had pretended to be clueless, saying she had no idea her husband was working for the Dark Lord. Luckily, the ministry believed her, with the help of some gold of course. This year I ended up sitting apart from the rest of the Slytherins. They all blamed my family. No, not for being caught supporting You-Know-Who, but for mother denying it. They just had to be perfect little Slytherins, didn't they?

Back to Author's POV-

Draco's sneer turned nastier as Pansy Parkinson slid onto the bench beside him. She, unlike the other Slytherins, still seemed to follow Draco where ever he went.

"Hello Dracie-poo! How was your summer?" Pansy giggled at her little pet name for Draco.

"How do you think its been?" he growled. He still had no respect for her, after all she was just a giggling airhead.

"Aww. Come one. We don't hate you. Just watch. Everything will be all right in a few days. They'll blame you for a bit and then forget all about it."

Harry was glad to finally be back in Hogwarts. It was more of a home than Privet Drive had ever been. Of course, this summer had been better than most thanks to certain owl incidents. The members of The Order had kept him entertained and up to date on all Voldemort business. Oddly enough, Voldemort had been quiet all summer. Except for that Death Eater raid. Harry smiled at the memory.

Cheesy Flashback-

Harry was picking at the moldy three-week-old salad Aunt Petunia was feeding him for dinner with a fork. Summer was almost over and it had been horrible so far. Death threats, stalkers, Dudley's gang, more death threats, moldy food, and more death threats. Nothing out of the ordinary.

He sighed as he heard a tapping on the window. Harry glanced in that direction. His eyes nearly popped out as he saw one of the schools owl's. It seemed his Hogwarts letter was finally here. Too bad it came during dinner.

Uncle Vernon tilted his head at the peculiar sound. Now where was it coming from? He rubbed his chin with his hand as he pondered this _very_ difficult question. It sounded a bit like…like tapping. On the window…Hang on a sec…Tapping on the window!

Uncle Vernon sprang up off his chair as though he had just sat on a hot coal. "GET YOUR OWL IN HERE!"

Harry quickly sprinted to the window and threw it open. He grabbed the letter from the owl rather forcefully and shoved it off into the night, leaving quite a few of its feathers rumpled.

Uncle Vernon grabbed Harry by the collar and unconsciously lifted him up about 5 inches. "What were you thinking receiving letter from those freaky friends of yours!"

"But – I didn't – It was from school!"

"Don't give me any excuses. I don't care _where_ it came from. I don't want any more of…THOSE in my house!" He dropped Harry to the floor and sat down, back to his dinner as if nothing had happened.

Harry growled under his breath…the nerve of some people. Vernon should be thanking the owl. It was the reason Harry would be out of the house in a matter of weeks. Thinking it would be best to go with his uncle's approach, pretending as if though nothing happened, he joined the "family" at the table.

5 minutes passed…8…10…15…and Harry was still picking at his uneaten salad…how _was_ he supposed to eat it? He heaved a sigh and put down the fork. He'd rather go upstairs to bed than watch Dudley pigging out on pie. At that same moment, something large and gray collided heavily with Mr.Dursley's head.

'_Who in their right minds would throw an overused dust rag in here?'_ thought Harry as he gaped with his mouth wide open. Uncle Vernon's face was quickly going through all possible shades of red and quickly darkening to purple.

Harry took another look and his horror grew. What first seemed to be a _very_ dirty dust rag was actually Errol, the Weasley family owl.

"What the hell is up with these bloody owls!"

"Sorry Uncle Vernon. I swear it won't happen again!" Harry gently picked up Errol. "May I go upstairs and put him—"

"—NOO!" Uncle Vernon roared. "You will _sit down_, and we will have a _normal_ dinner! And you had better pray to whatever freaky little god your kind worship that there will be no more owls coming through my window, or else I promise to personally tear the next one apart, limb-by-limb. Then Ill take the remains and feed them to Marge's dogs, have them spit it up, and that will be your next dinner."

Harry sat back down and placed Errol on his lap hoping he would stay there until he would be able to take him up to his room. He had even tried being polite, and what had that gotten him? A very vivid owl threat. And a promise of a meal he was not really looking forward to.

Harry just sat there pretending to eat. He had long since given up even trying. A hoot came from the window as a midnight black owl with shocking blue eyes passed through.

Dudley's piggy eyes widened in horror. "DUCK AND COVER!" He dropped to the floor and crouched underneath the table. Apparently, that left no room for anyone else down there.

"Dudley! Nudge over a bit for mummy-kins!" squeaked Aunt Petunia frantically. With quite a bit of effort and mysterious grunting noises, room was miraculously made for her to be able to squeeze in. As the tablecloth hid them from view Harry was sure he heard, "You'll have to find your own place to hide," coming from a very muffled sounding Petunia.

Harry scoffed. He wasn't planning on hiding. He was going to get that new letter even if it killed him, which it probably would. Harry jumped up on the desk and tried to catch the owl, which was now furiously trying to peck out Uncle Vernon's eyes.

"No—more—" sputtered Uncle Vernon in between pecks, "—blasted—owls!"

Harry fingers closed around a soft something. Hoping it was the owl Harry yanked…hard. Uncle Vernon let out a shriek of rage, because the thing Harry had just grabbed was his head.

Harry lost his balance on top of the table and came tumbling down. The two of them rolled across the kitchen in a jumbled mess. Uncle Vernon's face now looked like an overgrown plum.

Harry stopped for a moment to admire the owl. It was relentlessly attacking Vernon no matter how much he fought…kind of reminded Harry of someone. He shook his head and snapped out of his daze. No matter how much he was enjoying seeing his uncle being pummeled by an owl, he had to get that letter…and get out alive to read it.

Harry stood still waiting for the perfect moment. As Uncle Vernon ran to the living room faster than Harry thought any human being capable of, Harry grabbed the vicious owl, which was currently in the middle of a dive.

With the new owl perched under his shoulder, and the previously forgotten Errol in his arms, Harry dashed up the stairs two at a time. The house was deadly quiet. '_Wonder what Uncle Vernon is doing now? Who cares…I'm going to be in a load of trouble anyway,'_ thought Harry morosely.

He took out some of Hedwig's treats for the two owls. "Lets see what we have here." He untied the scroll from Errol's leg first, leaving the mystery owl for later. The letter read:

_Dear Harry,_

_Have you heard? Of course you haven't. You're stuck with the muggles after all. Malfoy's dad just got himself landed in Azkaban! Isn't that brilliant? Best piece of news we've heard all summer. Caught during some sort of raid. Dad won't tell me the details. Says I'm not old enough. But I'll know anyway, it's going to be all over the Prophet tomorrow morning. And Fred and George are getting their old extendable ears out of course!_

_P.S.- Will you stay with us for the last month of vacation? Mum is going mad with worry that they'll try to murder you or something. We're at you-know-where with Snuffles._

_-Ron_

Harry smiled with glee. Malfoy's dad in Azkaban. Now he just needed to know how exactly it happened, so he could replay it over and over in his dreams.

The black owl was glancing from the owl treat to Harry, looking suspicious. Harry had never known an owl that could look suspicious. Harry reached over to the scroll attached to its leg.

_Harry,_

_It's dangerous sending such information in a letter, but we figure it's going to be all over the news anyway. No matter if it's intercepted._

_As you might have heard from your friend Ronald already (nosy little prat) several death eaters were captured this evening. Yes, the git Lucius Malfoy was with that lot as well. Seems that You-Know-Who and his slimy group of supporters got overly confident. They decided to raid the ministry. Blubbering idiots. Apparated right into a room of 50 aurors holding a meeting (including yours truly). Not the best of situations. As you can imagine some dueling followed. I myself lost another chunk of my nose._

_Anyway, 30 against 50. The odds were not in their favor. Twelve of their number were killed, one suffering heavy injuries, another with a tree branch sprouting out of his nose, and the rest captured. The flowers on the branch were quite colorful. _

_Currently sitting locked up in Azkaban. A special guard of aurors in addition to those filthy dementors guarding them. Traitorous group the dementors are if you ask me. _

_Nothing more to tell. You-Know-Who was with the attacking group, although he managed to escape. Looks like you still have a job ahead, eh?_

_-Moody_

P.S. – Mrs. Weasley sends her love and forcefully requests that you join us for the remainder of the summer. If you refuse I shall come over there, gag you, blindfold you, tie you up, shove you into a potato sack, and get you here myself. If you accept…same thing.

Professor Moody. Figures. That explains the owl's strange behavior and the odd comments in the letter. Harry grabbed a spare quill from his desk and a fresh piece of parchment. Quickly he scribbled:

_Professor Moody,_

_Please tell Mrs. Weasley that I would love to join you all for the holidays…just as long as I don't come tied up in a bag. I'm absolutely thrilled that Mr. Malfoy is finally in azkaban. Thanks for the news._

_-Harry_

There. That was good enough. Now for Ron's letter.

_Ron, _

_That's brilliant! Of course Ill stay with you. I've already written that in my reply to the other letter. About that. I've gotten most of the details from Moody. He sent a letter. I'll bring it when I come over so you can read it, if you don't know what's going on by then. _

_-Harry _

That's all. Sure, his letters were a bit short, but what did they expect? He wasn't about to write a novel. Harry turned back to the owls and saw that Moody's owl had finally eaten its treat and was nosing around for more. Errol was taking a drink from Hedwig's water bowl.

"I hope you're both ready for a trip back," said Harry. The black owl hooted indifferently while Errol gave a tired wheeze. Not the best responses but they would have to do. Harry tied on his replies, one for each owl, and sent them off out of his window.

End Flashback-

Harry smiled as he remembered this. Sure, he was in a spot of trouble with Uncle Vernon afterwards, but that hardly mattered anymore. And Moody still used a potato sack. He insisted it was for Harry's "safety". Harry would bet his broomstick that the old man just needed a laugh, and Harry was his poor unsuspecting victim.

Draco sat at the Sytherin table chewing a mouthful of roasted duck. Potter had a dazed goofy grin on his face. '_Wonder what he's on about,'_ thought Draco. He looked disdainfully around him. There was a good five feet on either side of him that no one dared occupy. The seats across from him and five feet to both sides were also empty.

It was all his bloody father's fault. If only he hadn't gotten caught. '_Wait, no that was a good thing._' If only he had never joined the Dark Lord. '_That's better.'_

Summer Flashback-

The window was open, letting in a cool breeze and a shaft of moonlight. The sound of a quill scratching across a piece of parchment filled the room. Very expensive and high quality parchment at that. Otherwise, the room was deadly silent.

Draco Malfoy sat studiously at his desk, writing swiftly. It wasn't homework he was doing. No, he had finished that ages ago. His father had him researching "_Top 50 Spells to Kill a Muggle"_ every evening. Avada Kedavra was right at the top of his list, along with 49 more. He had to list them all and provide a detailed explanation of how each worked. Oh joy.

Draco glanced at the clock. The red digital numbers pulsed 12:00. Midnight. He put down the quill and rubbed his eyes tiredly. That _had_ to be enough for tonight. He had 20 curses left to research and only 2 weeks to do it. Sure there was a month until school started but father insisted that he was pathetic and should pick up the pace. So that's 10 curses per week…and 2 a night if he wanted to leave his weekends free. _Great._

The door suddenly burst open with a loud thump. Moving with inhuman speed, Draco immediately whipped out his wand from within his robes, spun around, grabbed his attacker, and had his wand to the attacker's throat all within a second.

His so-called attacker turned out to be his mother. Draco sighed deeply and released her. You could never be to careful these days…especially living under this roof. His father often sprung little "tests" such as these. He would burst in unexpectedly and attacked Draco. If Draco couldn't react fast enough he often ended up sporting various wounds and bruises for weeks after, not allowed to heal them as his father claimed they were useful reminders.

"Sorry mother. I thought you were someone else." Draco took a deep breath and prepared for the verbal onslaught that usually followed these incidents. It never came.

"Oh Draco!" Narcissa wrapped her arms around Draco and hugged him fiercely. In his arms she broke down and started sobbing hysterically. That was strange. His mother never dared cry freely with his father around. Of course, he thought it as a sign of weakness…and weakness invoked violence.

Draco softly stroked his mother hair. "What's wrong mother? Is it father?"

Narcissa hugged Draco tighter. "Mhm…" She nodded her head looking ridiculously like a three year old buried in the folds of Draco's robes.

"What's he done this time?"

This time she sprang up and started laughing. _'Oh no,' _thought Draco, '_she's finally snapped.'_

She clapped her hands gleefully and smiled. "He's gone and gotten himself caught."

"Caught?" inquired Draco. What did she mean by caught.

"Yes caught," she was returning to her usual haughty self even though her face was streaked with black tears. Black most likely from her smudged mascara. "Didn't I say that? Caught. That idiot went on another one of his raids and got himself caught by the ministry."

She paused for a moment to let this sink in then continued. "Don't you know what this means? We're finally free!"

'_Er…okay. Looks like I completely misjudged mother.'_ Draco gave his mother a comforting hug. "That's right. He's gone." Draco could have jumped for joy. Only…that was very un-Malfoyish. It's not that his father didn't treat him well – wait, no. That was it.

'_Ha. Serves him right. Hopefully this will last.' _

Draco joined Narcissa as she danced around the room, occasionally spinning her in his arms as if she were a three-year old. If these antics were ever recorded, the Malfoys would never live it down.

Flashback End-

Draco's mind wandered back to the great hall as the droning background of voices had stopped. Professor Dumbledore stood waiting until the last people quieted down.

"Ahem…toffee anyone?" Several students raised their hands. Amazingly enough a few pieces levitated across the room to said students. Faint thank yous were heard as several more students gathered enough courage to raise their hands.

"You're welcome. Very well then…off you go." The headmaster sat back down, beaming, and popped a toffee into his own mouth.

Professor McGonagall ahemed rather loudly and shot him one of her famous tight-lipped glares. "The speech Professor."

"Oh…yes. It seems in my old age, I'm getting senile. Now where was I?"

"About to start."

"Yes. Now that you've all been fed, I implore that you spare a few moments to listen to an old codgers rantings." Dumbledore paused before continuing. "As you well know by now the Forbidden Forest is of course, forbidden. Off limits to you pesky students. In more recent news the squid in the lake has become rather…hostile. Please refrain from dropping the remains of your breakfasts in the lake if you do not want to end up like our dear Nearly-Headless Nick."

"Also there will be a few changes with your dormitories this year. Fifth years and up will be each assigned their own sleeping quarters. In other words fifth, sixth, and seventh years each get their own room to decorate and furnish as they want. You'll no longer need to worry about your best friend stealing your pet chicken and insisting he was nowhere near your trunk. _I'll never forgive him for that!_" Dumbledore took several calming breaths. "Er…yes. That's all very nice. Rooms password protected and so on. Ahah! My awaited news. There is to be a new program this year, for fifth through seventh years. It's the reason for your new quarters. My toaster awaits! Tata!" With this odd farewell Dumbledore strode down the rows, and away, leaving the Great Hall in a mass of confusion.

A/N: Yes I know that was boring. Yes I know the end was horrible. But what do you want? It's late and I want to go to sleep now. I promise the next chapter will be more exciting and less coffee-induced. There _will_ be a point. I just had to get the plot started out and a bit explained. Please review and tell me what you think of this mess so far! 3 Good-night.

This ended up being uploaded a week or so later. I'm so lazy.


	2. Of Rooms, Coffee, And Unfortunate Pairin...

**A/N**: I officially despise They mess with my format. --;; So the first chapter ended up completely different looking than I meant it to be. They erase _all_ my dividers no matter what kind they are…dashes…slashes…whatever. So I need to figure out a new type. Five people reviewed. Yay. The most I ever got for a single chapter. Thanks a bunch. Sorry this couldn't come out earlier. I'm grounded for one and a half more months and school is sort of hectic.

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Eventually the prefects rounded up the confused group, and herded them up to their proper common rooms. Although a few trailing Ravenclaws somehow ended up tied up in the corner of the Slytherin common room.

Up in the Gryffindor common room, a crowd was murmuring restlessly. Hermione Granger picked up a chair, dragged it to the front of the crowd, stood on it so every one could see her, and called for attention.

"Every body listen up! Since I am Head Girl and I happen to be in Gryffindor, I'll be directing you to your rooms. Please shift your attention to these two doors," she said pointing to two new doors behind her. Every student looked at the doors, which were located at the bottom of the stairs leading up the first through fourth year dormitories.

Very good," exclaimed Hermione and continued. "I will be reading each of your names off a scroll and telling you the location of your new room. The door on the left is all girls. The door on the right is for boys. Although all of you will have your own room, you will have to share a bathroom with four other people. Your belongings will already be in your assigned rooms so no need to worry."

Hermione unrolled a large scroll that rolled in a complete circle around the common room. "Aader, Kate!"

A blonde fifth year stepped forward. Hermione motioned toward the left door and said, "Left door, up the stairs to the fifth floor, sixth door to the left." The girl nodded and went through the left door.

Quite some time later, the room was considerably emptier than before. Hermione gasped for breath as she summoned a large jug of water.

"Nearly done I think…" She poured herself a glass and instantly gulped it down. "Yes…ahem. Weasley, Ginevra."

Ginny stepped forward and waited to be directed. "Oh hello Ginny. Left door, up all the way to the top, twelfth floor I think, second door to the right."

"Thanks Hermione." Ginny went through the door and looked up the winding staircase. It appeared a _long_ way to the top.

Surprisingly enough Ginny reached the top in no more than a couple seconds without even breaking a sweat. As with every other flight she had passed, there was a door.

'_Too many doors,'_ she thought but went through anyway. On this floor, or hall rather, there were only five more doors widely spaced. Two on the right, two on the left, and one at the end of the hall. The one at the end had a small golden label that read 'Bathroom' so apparently no one lived there. Or so Ginny hoped.

Vaguely Ginny remembered hearing that each hall slash floor had about ten doors. Eight rooms, two bathrooms she supposed. They must have run out of people so there was extra room on this floor.

Ginny walked up to her door. No label on this one, thank god. She didn't need freaky stalkers, creeping up to this floor in the middle of the night and seeing exactly which room she slept in. '_Let them guess instead.'_

She turned the doorknob and went in. Inside were a bed, a few chairs, and her luggage. "Well this is pretty empty," she said aloud. Just then, Ginny spotted something on her bed.

Upon closer inspection, Ginny saw that it was a piece of paper and a sort of catalogue. She chose to read the paper first. It read the following:

_Dear Ms. Weasley,_

With this letter you will find a catalogue on your bed. It contains different furniture, wallpaper/paint colors, decorations, and window hangings. To choose one for your room simply point your wand at the picture. Have fun arranging your room!

Ginny folded it up and slipped it inside her pocket seeing as how she didn't have a garbage can yet. She opened the catalogue and her mouth dropped wide open. All the furniture was best quality and was worthy of a Malfoy. Not that she was complementing Malfoy of course. It's just that some of these things must have had a price tag bigger than her house!

'_Well…might as well take advantage of it.'_

Ginny spent the next hour or so flipping through the catalogue and admiring all the furniture. In the end, she settled with a lavender theme. Lilac walls; one of those muggle bunk beds with a swinging couch on the bottom instead of a second bed, lavender of course; soft lavender carpet about an inch or so thick, charmed not to wear down; full-length mirror made of some light cream colored wood; a bedside table of the same wood; a desk in still the same wood; an armoire so she wouldn't have to keep all her clothes in a trunk; and random lavender decorations such as candles, a pot of African violets that would probably die within a week, seashells for some odd reason, and other things to make her room feel more comfortable and lived in.

What the letter neglected to mention was that none of these items would arrive already positioned. Ginny got a shock when the bed fell out of midair in the room nearly trapping her underneath. The old bed of course disappeared.

Ginny spent another two hours fussing over the position of everything until she deemed her room perfect. Finally, she stuffed the catalogue in a table drawer and collapsed on the bed.

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Meanwhile (or a bit earlier actually), Draco Malfoy did _not_ spend three hours furnishing his new room. He spent five instead. The color theme for his room was apparent. Black. Only black for Malfoys…with a bit of Slytherin green mixed in there somewhere.

A bed made of dark oak with silk black sheets, black carpet, black table, black chairs, black wardrobe, black bed stand, white walls thankfully, the odd gothic-like black candles floating in mid-air, black curtains, and even a black cat named Joye.

Of course, he had to have the traditional fireplace, convenient for burning corpses—er…that is…inconveniently placed…stuff. Right…

And since Draco was _so_ _gorgeous,_ he just _had_ to have a mirror…or two…or five… So at this moment Draco was deciding which wall to transfigure into a mirror.

'_Hm…maybe the one next to my bed. I do enjoy watching myself as I sleep.'_

Ugh, so narcissistic. And he didn't even notice that it's actually impossible to watch yourself while you sleep. Aren't your eyes already closed?

Draco sat down on his bed and inspected his room. '_Not bad,'_ he thought as Joye jumped into his lap and started purring.

Oh right. Joye. Draco's most trusted friend. And probably only friend other than Blaise Zabini. Draco had found Joye during the summer. It was actually a Tuesday, while Draco was selling off some dark artifacts he no longer needed since his father's "departure".

He was wandering around Knockturn Alley when he rounded a corner and tripped over something. After retrieving a vial of smoky grey potion, which had questionable effects, he saw a relatively small jet-black kitten on the ground.

As he saw it lying there, emitting pitiful squeaks, he felt a rare burst of compassion. For some unknown reason, he had taken it home and nursed it back to health. From then on Draco was never seen without Joye. He had named her Joye for one reason…that's what it said on her nametag…along with the owner's address. But then again, Malfoys aren't known for returning things to their proper places, are they now?

"Perfect." His body hit the silk sheets at the same time another certain Gryffindor hit hers.

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Ginny opened her eyes and wondered why the hell she felt so uncomfortable. Then she realized that she has fallen asleep in her clothes and shoes. Well since she was already dressed, there was no need to hurry in fear of being late for breakfast or her first class. More time to wander around the grounds. She critically eyed her room one last time. '_Perfect.'_

Ginny grabbed her bag and slung it over her shoulder. Wander the grounds, breakfast, and then straight to lessons was her plan. She went out her room, walked through the hall and the door at the end, and down the amazingly long stairs, which yet again took less time than should have. It's as if she walked all those stairs in the time it should have taken to walk one flight. Now she was sure those stairs were bewitched.

As soon as she walked into the common room she noticed a crowd gathered around the Gryffindor bulletin board. As she watched, she saw a curious third year shove through the group, and out of sight. She emerged a few seconds later with an expression of a kind of disgusted disappointment. "Stupid Hogwarts…" she was muttering.

Ginny noticed Hermione standing by her side. "The twins up to something again?"

Hermione just smiled and shook her head. "Go see for yourself."  
Ginny looked at Hermione as if she had suddenly grown two more heads as she left through the portrait of the Fat Lady. Hermione rarely gave her vague answers, only when the golden trio and saving the world were concerned.

As the third year had done, Ginny fought her way through the crowd and to the bulletin board.

The first thing she noticed was a newly pinned sigh flashing dazzling colors in the middle of the board. '_Hey! This looks like an explanation of that new program Professor Dumbledore was telling us about.'_ Ginny leaned closer to read the details.

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Draco groaned as the sunlight streamed from his window, and into his eyes. Through squinted eyes, he glanced at the alarm clock on his bed stand. 6:00 a.m. What business did the sun have rising at this time anyway? '_Too early. No coffee. Screw the world.'_

Draco rolled over and pulled the silk covers over his head to drown out the light and return to blissful sleep. Yea right. On this dreaded morning, nothing happened as it should.

The door to the room burst open with a bang and something _really_ heavy dropped on top of Draco's legs.

"Wakey wakey my little Drakey!" Who else but the faithful Blaise Zabini?

"Get off and go on a diet…" grumbled Draco. Well…at least he tried to. It came out more like "Gerugh…"

"Now that's no response to someone trying to do you a favor." Blaise frowned and yanked off the covers.

Still wearing yesterday's clothes, Draco didn't feel much of a difference in temperature, but the pesky sun problem was back. "Urgh…this isn't a favor."

"Course it is," said Blaise as he dug around in Draco's wardrobe for some fresh clothes to change into. "You'll want to read about the program and enter before all the spots are filled up."

"No way am I getting up…ever." Draco curled up and turned around so the sunlight hit his back.

"I'll get you coffee?"

"Er…no."

"With cream, cinnamon, and those little muggle marshmallows you like so much?"

"Now that's proper bribery," said Draco as he reluctantly got up from his bed and grabbed the clothes Blaise had laid out for him. Only Blaise knew his weakness. Coffee. With lots of sugar, cream, and all those other fattening things. And those mini-marshmallows. Draco had to threaten Blaise with death and mutilation when he had first found out about the marshmallows, to keep him from telling other Slytherins. If they ever found out he was so obsessed with a muggle sweet he would never get over it.

"The house elves won't let me in the kitchen in the mornings any more. They're terrified of what would happen if they ran out of marshmallows," shouted Draco from the bathroom where he was changing into his chosen clothes.

As soon as he was finished he and Blaise went down to the common room to look at the program explanations.

"As soon as we're done you better keep your promise," grumbled Draco.

"Of course I will! When have I ever let you down?"

"Plenty of times now that you mention it."

"That's not the point."

There was a small mass of people around the Slytherin bulletin board. Draco shoved aside an insignificant 5th year who was blocking his view. The overly flashy sign read:

_Hogwarts Sponsoring a New Program!_

_Hogwarts is proud to announce that we will be participating in a new program this year. This program was designed to encourage inter-house unity and a little bit of fun for the students of Hogwarts. _

_This program is a modified version of a muggle "television" show called _Queer Eye for the Straight Guy_. We shall be calling this program H.I.R.M. (standing for Hogwarts Interhouse Relationship Makeover). During H.I.R.M. students will be paired up with students from a different house. Then the students will proceed to spend time with their partner while making over his/her room, look, and overall style._

_Fifth, sixth, and seventh years are qualified. Unfortunately, there are only a limited number of spots. To enter write your full name, year, and house on a piece of parchment. Then submit it to the judge who will be pairing you off. The judge can be found on a stool in the middle of the Great Hall for the rest of the day. Pairing will take place at dinner today. _

_-Hogwarts Staff_

Draco sneered at the sign. How ridiculous was that! The program was a waste of time. Dumbledore really _was_ getting senile to permit that into the school. And based on that muggle tellybision nonsense!

Draco grabbed Blaise by the arm and dragged him out the Slytherin common room and in the direction of the kitchen.

Blaise obediently followed. "So are you going to enter?"

"What? No," growled Draco. "It's pointless and complete crap."

"All right. Suit yourself. I'm entering. Might be a bit of fun."

At that point the arrived at the painting of the bowl of fruit. Draco tickled the portrait. As it swung open, he pushed Blaise inside. "Coffee. Now."

Blaise chuckled. "At once your highness."

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Ginny sat in the Great Hall a while later stabbing at her eggs and bacon, thinking things over. '_Maybe I should enter. I _do_ need some fun. And this would be great to meet people in other houses I don't know yet. All right. I'll enter. But not by myself.'_

Ginny came to a conclusion. As she looked up from her plate, she saw Harry, Hermione, and Ron enter the hall. She immediately waved them over. As they sat down around her she asked, "Read about the new program yet?"

Ron was shoving his food into his mouth so fast, that any passerby would have thought they were starving him at home. "Suh weh ave," said Ron spraying Ginny with bits of soggy thrice-chewed toast.

Harry shook his head and translated. "What he means to say is 'Sure we have.'"

Ginny nodded as she performed a quick cleaning spell on herself. "Any of you thinking of joining?"

Ron was about to reply but Harry firmly clamped his hand over his mouth. "Er…sorry Ron. I don't think Ginny will enjoy wearing your toast to her first class," he said as he removed his hand as soon as he was sure Ron wouldn't attempt talking. Ron looked indignant but obediently shut his mouth.

"Well…" said Harry, turning to Ginny, "I've thought about it and I'm not so sure. I mean, who knows who I'll get paired with."

"But Harry!" exclaimed Ginny, "That's the point. You're not supposed to know. You're supposed to get to know people from other houses better. Not get paired up with an old friend!"

"Well…maybe."

"How about you, Ron? Just nod or shake your head. No response required."

Ron just shrugged and went back to his toast, which was now dripping with butter, syrup…and even some chocolate muggle sprinkles.

"And you, Hermione?"

Hermione looked at Ron disapprovingly as she civilly ate her food. "Well…I've thought about it but I don't really know. It _will_ be a wonderful opportunity to make friends…"

"So you're all not sure. Well…" said Ginny thoughtfully. It might be time for a little begging. "I've been thinking as well…and…I thought it might be fun to enter. Just a bit of relaxing from exams and homework, and meeting new people to borrow clothes from. But I really don't want to do it alone. So…if you guys decide you'd enter, then we could join as a team."

Hermione turned from glaring at Ron to looking thoughtful. "Well…it doesn't sound too bad but I still don't know."

"Oh please!" And the begging ensued. "Come on Hermione. You'll meet up with new people. And Ron, would you rather work with me or leave your poor little sister to deal with some big bully Slytherin or something alone? And Harry…er…please?"

Ginny had literally dropped to her knees at this point, which put her underneath the table, so Ginny couldn't see their faces. All she could see were their knees and feet shifting nervously, or was it guiltily, as they decided.

Hermione was the deciding voice for the trio. "All right Ginny. Get up. We'll join the program with you as a team."

"Thanks Hermione, Harry, Ron." She hugged each of them in turn and continued eating until a question popped up in her mind. "Er…Hermione? Where is this so called judge?"

Hermione pointed to a hat on a small stool in the middle the Great Hall. "There."

"Oh right."

Hermione dug around in her bag for a piece of parchment and a quill. "I'll enter us. Don't worry."

Ginny nodded and watched Hermione as she quickly scribbled in her neat handwriting. When she was done the paper read:

Ginny Weasley, Sixth Year, Gryffindor.  
Ron Weasley, Seventh Year, Gryffindor.

Harry Potter, Seventh Year, Gryffindor.

Hermione Granger, Seventh Year, Gryffindor.

Hermione folded it into a small square. "I'll go and enter us then, shall I?"

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Blaise emerged from the kitchens what seemed like an hour later, but at least he held a large mug of steaming coffee in his hands.

"What kept you?" said Draco as he grabbed the coffee and gratefully sipped it.

"Met someone on my way in."

"Someone other than those dreaded house elves, I hope."

"Of course! A charming blonde Ravenclaw."

"And…" inquired Draco.

"Well…let's just say the house elves were more than willing to provide the needed whipped cream, fudge, and cherries."

"Somehow I doubt you were just making dessert."

"Yes well…I got your coffee didn't I? And I put the right things in there as well."

"That you did." Half the coffee in the mug was already gone. "Now it's to the Great Hall for breakfast."

The two walked into said Great Hall, and headed for the Slytherin table. This morning the Slytherins didn't seem to be as hostile towards Draco as last night. One or two even waved at him. Talk about short memories.

"Looks like they're not bitching about your father anymore," said Blaise.

Draco snorted. "Very good detective. How observant…" There goes that early morning sarcasm.

Blaise shook his head and reached into his bag for a quill and parchment.

"What in Merlin's beard are you writing? You were never the type to do homework, let alone do it at breakfast."

"Never do homework? Why you insult me," said Blaise with mock hurt. "Do you consider me on the intellectual level of those brainless oafs Crabbe and Goyle?"

"Of course not. Those two couldn't tell the difference between the front and rear end of a broomstick."

Blaise finished up his writing and folded up the bit of parchment. "For your information I was entering the program." With that, he stood up and approached the beat up old cowboy hat perched on a stool. 'Whoa. Dumbledore really is off his rocker.'

As he drew closer he saw that annoying know-it-all Granger coming closer as well. Damn.

They reached the nice stool at the same time. "Er…h-hello," said the female twit.

Blaise just smirked and dropped his parchment into the hat. "You know you don't have to attempt a conversation with every guy you set eyes on."

"I was just trying to be nice!" she exclaimed indignantly.

"Nice and Slytherins don't mix. Think about it." He went off with a wave and another one of his smirks.

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The rest of the day was uneventful for Ginny except for a certain incident in Transfiguration. Luna had accidentally transfigured Professor McGonagall into a five-humped camel.

Ginny wanted the time to pass faster. It was nearly the end of double Potions and she couldn't wait for dinner. The pairing announcments for the program were supposed to take place.

Ginny stared at Snape with an expression of deep concentration on her face, mentally willing him to dismiss the class. 'Let us go you slimy old bat.' She stared harder. 'Let us goooooo…' Just when it seemed she was going to stare his nose off, Snape spun around on his heel and barked, yes barked, "Class dismissed! Twelve inches on the uses of moonstone for homework."

Oh great. Another essay. But at this point Ginny couldn't really bring herself to care. Dinner!

Out the door, up the stairs, out of the dungeon, and through the doors of the Great Hall. Ginny plunked down next to Hermione.

Ginny looked around. Everyone in the Great Hall was wolfing down their food as if they had been fed only Harry's mold summer salad for the past few weeks. It looked like everyone was anxious for dinner to end and for the announcments to begin. So Ginny followed their example and did the same.

Approximately five minutes later when everyone managed to digest a decent meal without choking or suffucating on bits of unchewed turkey, much, Dumbledore stood up and cleared his throat. The students were immediately silenced.

"As was promised we shall now announce the pairings for our new program. Unfortunately, I regret to say that we had a little…problem. I take full responsibility for being daft. I forgot to mention that you cannot sign up as teams."

'Oops,' Ginny thought. 'What now?'

"Therefore our hat has taken the trouble to separate you all. Unfortunately this has thrown off the balance of the number of students participating from each house, so I'm afraid that some of you will have to tolerate being paired up with a member of your own house. Now without further ado we shall proceed."

Well…it wasn't that bad. 'I just don't feel to good being separated from Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Oh well. I've got to grow up sometime.' Ginny turned her gaze to the hat which was now glowing bright red.

After a few moments the glow turned a funky sort of purple and two pieces of paper shout out. Dumbledore snatched them out of the air and read. "Harry Potter, seventh year, Gryffindor and Pansy Parkinson, seventh year, Slytherin."

Ginny grimaced. Poor Harry. Imagine being stuck with a Slytherin. Especially Pansy! He looked like he was about to puke in the middle of the Great Hall. His face even had that greenish tinge.

A few more papers flew by before she heard another familiar name. "Ron Weasley, seventh year, Gryffindor and Luna Lovegood, sixth year, Ravenclaw."

'Haha,' thought Ginny. 'Luna's had a crush on Ron forever.' Ginny thought she deserved a go a Ron. 'Merlin knows Hermione had enough chances.'

Speaking of Hermione… "Hermione Granger, seventh year, Gryffindor and Blaise Zabini, seventh year, Slytherin."

At that Hermione tinged a faint pink but didn't look too disgusted. Ginny felt sorry for her too. Two of her friends were paired up with Slytherins. Wow. If Ginny had the same kind of luck she'd end up being paied with Goyle or something.

"Ginny Weasley, sixth year, Gryffindor…"

Ginny's heart seemed to miss a beat at her name. She should really spend less time daydreaming. The moment of final suspense…

"And Draco Malfoy, seventh year, Slytherin."

'What?'

Well…nearly as bad as Goyle.

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A/N: Yay! Finally got this finished. Please give me feedback. Any questions comments? Hope to update soon. ((Still grounded here))


	3. Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titlillandos

A/N: I am so smart. I'm not writing this fanfic in order. For example…I didn't even finish my first chapter. That's how long ago for you I'm writing this. xD My friend just had a wicked idea for this chapter title. So I decided to write it. And besides. The introduction was boring me. x3 As you may have noticed the title is _"Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titlillandos"_ which according to my friend is the Hogwarts motto and means "_Never tickle a sleeping dragon." _First of all, cool motto. xD Secondly that reminded me of Draco. So you'll see the connection in this chapter. Happy reading. And when you see a number on top of a word, scroll to the bottom to see an explanation of the way I use it in this fic.

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Chapter No. 3

Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titlillandos 

Never tickle a sleeping _Draco_

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Ginny stormed through the halls. How could Dumbledore do this to her! Actually it was all that bloody hat's fault. Damn cowboy hat should be cremated if it couldn't do teams. And Malfoy! How could she be paired with _him_? She couldn't even stand to be in the same room with him. How could they expect her to remodel his room all by herself! Oh the unfairness of life. "So much for teamwork…" she muttered quietly.

In her fury, she didn't notice anyone in her way until it was too late. At the collision both of them fell.

Ginny fell forward dropping her books in the process. She squeezed her eyes shut as someone else's books fell on _her_. And guess what else. They had the luck to bump into each other right in front of the stairs, so naturally they both went tumbling down.

Ginny gave a _feminine_ grunt as she landed on something squishy and soft. _'Since when are there pillows at the bottom of the staircases?'_ She lay there for a bit checking if all her limbs were still attached. As soon as she was fairly sure the hadn't detached anything during the fall she sighed with relief. Let's take a moment to enjoy the finer things in life…and another to just enjoy the quiet. _'Hm…minty. And a faint trace of pine trees. And maybe a bit of exotic spices.'_ Minty? Pine trees? What the hell? Since when did the house elves put complementary mints from Peru on non-existent pillows at the bottom of the staircases? Even in Hogwarts that was a bit unusual.

Ginny opened her eyes to find herself staring at someone else's cool gray ones.

"Glad you decided to take your time getting up, Weasel." Drawled an all too familiar voice.

Ginny rolled herself off of Draco Malfoy who was lying there with a smug smirk on his face. "You know you could have pushed me off yourself Ferret-boy!"

He got up and dusted his robes off. "I know. But it's more fun to see how long it takes you to do it yourself. I knew your family was never bright but this takes it to a whole new level."

"I was checking if all of me was still in one piece! Don't you ever insult my family." The famous Weasley temper was acting up again.

"It's all right Weasel."

"What?" Ginny stared at him in disbelief.

"You heard me. I can't help it if I'm so irresistible."

Ugh. That conceited git will make any situation about him and his good looks. '_Good looks? What am I thinking!'_

"You are not irresistible!"

"So you're saying you can resist my charms?"

"Yes. I mean no. You don't _have_ any charms to resist." This discussion sounded so childish in her head. "Just stop smelling so damn good!"

Silence. Neither of them had expected that comment.

Ginny turned on her heals and ran back up the stairs. She hurriedly picked up her books. "I've gone mental. I have to go." With that she ran off headed for her common room.

"Wait!" Too late. She was already gone. "No one ever said…I smelled good." Draco raised an eyebrow and halfheartedly went to pick up his own books.

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Ginny lay on her bed for a long time just thinking. About what? All sorts of different things. Her hate of Draco, her bump into Draco today, Harry's hate of Draco, Ron's hate of Draco, her hate of Draco, and her bump into Draco some more. Okay maybe there wasn't much difference in her thoughts, but she still hadn't come to a conclusion. She didn't even know what she was deciding. Was there even something to find a conclusion about?

There was a knock on her door. "Ginny?" It was Hermione. Ginny decided not to answer. What was the point? Hermione continued on anyway. "Well if you're in there I just thought you should know we're going down to dinner. Join us anytime you want." As an afterthought she added, "And I hope you're not still disappointed or mad about us not being able to be in the group. Its not our fault really. Sorry…"

Ginny listened to her footsteps fading away as she retreated down the stairs. _'No.'_ she thought. _'I don't think I want dinner today…Ill just stay here. Or do some homework.'_ She stood up and strode across her room to her desk. It was littered with parchment, quills, and random junk. She finally found her planner where she wrote all her homework. Ginny's eyes scanned the list. Nothing. She had done everything. Well…except Snape's essay. But that could wait.

"Or maybe no homework. I can always get started on the bloody program. The sooner I get it over with the better." Ginny reached into her bag and took out a pamphlet that all the participants had been given at the end of the pairings. It gave a basic overview of the aims of the program and what you were supposed to do. She quickly scanned through it. Room makeover (painting, décor, etc…), wardrobe makeover (shopping for clothes with your partner, redoing hair, etc…), and attitude makeover. Pretty basic…but with Malfoy that would take _ages_. Especially that attitude adjustment.

Those descriptions took up about two pages altogether. There were still about thirty pages left in that pamphlet and all of them were dedicated to different wallpapers, paint, and furnishings. She presumed that this booklet worked like the one where she chose furnishings for _her_ room.

"Hm…I can get ahead on some painting of Malfoy's room. It's not like he'll notice anyway. He'll be gone at dinner." She thought over her reasoning for a bit. "But he's bound to notice part of his room newly painted. And…there's the paint fumes to consider. That'll make it a bit hard to sleep…good! Then it's decided."

She leafed through the pamphlet trying to choose a color of paint. She was sorely tempted to choose the neon pink paint but refrained. In the end she settled for a sort of pastel-ish salad-ish green. "Painting a guy's room pink is just inhumane. Oh great. I really did go mental. I'm talking to myself in an empty room." She sighed and headed for Draco's dormitory.

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Coincidentally a certain Draco Malfoy had picked not to go to dinner either. Instead he remained on his bed thinking over the events of the day. Not many events to think about. The most interesting thing that had happened to him today was having that Weasley girl land on him. And that was pathetic. He could do better than that.

What was her name? Oh yes, Ginny. That's who he had been paired with for that stupid contest. _'Wait a second…'_ Draco sat up from his former lying position. '_I didn't even _enter_ that contest!'_ That's it. Someone was trying to off him like they did to Potter in fourth year. But this contest wasn't _dangerous_. '_Unless you count being paired with a man-eating demon with a temper to rival the devil's as dangerous.'_

There was a knock on Draco's door and Blaise came in without waiting for an answer. "Dinner time, my lovely!"

Right then…Blaise was weird. '_Maybe I should consider to take him to a head witch1. I've got a really good one. The rather nice blonde with the really sexy knickers and the kinky maid uniform and—whoops! That wasn't his head witch. That was his…oh who cares anyway?'_

"I don't feel like dinner. I feel like…" Crap he thought, but that wasn't a suitable answer. So instead he said, "…coffee. I want coffee."

"Oh come on! It's seven in the afternoon. If you drink coffee now you'll be up all night. Didn't your mum ever tell you that's bad for your health?"

"No."

"Oh. That's okay then. Just as long as I don't have to get it for you."

Mmmm…coffee. But there was still that minor irritation of the contest. If Draco didn't enter himself, then who did?

As Draco was imagining that steamy coffee aroma, it suddenly dawned on him.

Blaise.

Who else could have done it? Besides…Draco didn't exactly see what Blaise had written on his entrance paper. He could have entered Draco and a million other people for all he knew.

At that point Blaise decided that Draco was a hopeless case and headed for the door. Draco needed to stop him but he was too lazy to get up and walk. So he did the first thing that came to mind that didn't involve too much physical effort. He yanked off his shoe and threw it.

"OUCH!" The shoe had hit Blaise in the back of the head. Thanks to Draco's perfect aim. "What was that for?"

"Ergh. Come back here."

Blaise cautiously approached Draco as if he expected another shoe to be flung at him any second now.

"It was you," Draco accused.

"It was me what?"

"It was _you_ who entered me in the damn contest!" said Draco with his best and most intimidating glare that usually froze people on the spot.

"Nope. It was Pansy."

"Er…excuse me?" Draco was prepared for a full out groveling, please-forgive-me, begging, sniffling, crying, clinging…well you get the idea. He was expecting an apology. But he wasn't expecting this. "And why would she do that?"

"Well…she was hoping to get paired with you. Apparently she wasn't smart enough to realize that Slytherins don't get paired with Slytherins. Twit."

How low could Pansy go? Oh she'll pay. He just had to think of a way to get back at her. Sometime in the near future…eventually.

Wait…it suddenly hit him. Literally. Blaise had done one of his favorite things lately and jumped on him again. Only unfortunately Draco was standing this time so apparently he was unbalanced. The result was a very uncomfortable Draco, pinned underneath an obviously turned on Blaise, who's head had landed on Draco's crotch. Oh boy.

Draco shoved Blaise's leg off his face and gritted his teeth. "Could you kindly remove your face from my unmentionables?"

"Er…right." Blaise quickly sprang off Draco and helped pull him up. "Sorry. My fault."

"Damn right it is."

"Is there anything I can do to make up for it?" At the malicious grin spread over Draco's face, Blaise immediately regret asking that.

"As a matter of fact, yes there is. I was going to ask you to do me a favor anyway, and hope you wouldn't mind, but now you _have_ to do it. I need your help to get revenge on Pansy."

Blaise gulped. "Er… what do you want me to do?"

"Oh…nothing much. Just let Pansy seduce you."

"But Draco! You know that's—"

"Of course I do. But you'll just have to suffer through tonight. And I know she's revolting but sometimes you just have to suck it up. I expect to see her properly miserable when she comes back to the dormitories."

Blaise gave a resigned sigh. "Fine. Tell her midnight in the astronomy tower. I'll be there."

"Yes, but she won't know that. She'll think I'll be there. But you'll surprise her. So ha. Ha. Ha ha!" Okay…Draco was starting to sound oddly psychotic again…where was the address of that Head witch?

Anyway…fast forward to the common room.

Draco descended the stairs and went into the common room. '_Now where is Pansy? Oh wait…there she is, snogging a fourth year. Eww,'_ thought Draco with a shudder. He circled around her and said in a silky seductive voice, "You and me. The astronomy tower. Tonight. Midnight," and the waited for a reply.

No response. Pansy was so busy snogging the fourth year that she didn't even notice Draco. Whoah. That was a miracle. Usually she would be slobbering all over him within the second. "Ahem." Nope. Nothing.

'_Right. This calls for extreme action.'_ Draco grabbed the fourth year by the hair, yanked him off Pansy's…er…face, and threw him into the fireplace. Unfortunately the elf in charge of cleaning Slytherin was as senile as Dumbledore and had forgotten to light the fire.

He tried his I'm-going-to-seduce-you-and-then-shag-you-senseless voice again. "You and me. The astronomy tower. Tonight. Midnight." This time it worked. Pansy went all brainless and drooling. Oh wait. She was always like that.

"What are you planning, Dracie-poo?"

Ugh. Only Blaise could call him that and not end up hanging from the Hogwart's roof in the middle of a cold winter night with a large letter D pinned to his pajamas. But he chose to let her live, at least this time.

"You'll see. A little surprise."

Pansy squealed exuberantly, and Draco knew why. To Pansy a "surprise" _always_ involved whipped cream, whips, peanut butter, handcuffs, and a very thorough shagging. '_Hate to disappoint you, but it looks like we'll have to this time.'_

He smirked and gave a little wave. "You'll never forget tonight." '_Seriously. She never will.'_

He turned his back to her and started on the long journey back to his dorm. Well…it only took a couple of seconds, but every one of those seconds was a second wasted. And Draco Malfoy was a _very_ busy man.

Finally Draco was back in his own room again. '_Bah,'_ he thought. '_I'm too tired for dinner. I think I'll take a nice hot shower, and then a nap to keep myself sexy.'_

Yep. That's what he would do. Draco slipped off his robe and dropped it on his bed. Since he was head boy he had his own bathroom adjoining his dorm room. As he walked to said bathroom he shed his shirt and pants on the way. By the time he got to the bathroom door he was clothed in his pink ducky boxers—er… I mean the plain black boxers. They were silk, of course.

He went inside and, needless to say, took a shower. ((A/N:I doubt you need the details o-O))

About half an hour or so later, Draco came out with a towel hanging low on his hips, and his now gel-less hair was hanging in his eyes. Squeaky clean.

He had enough decency, but barely enough energy to change into a pair of baggy pajama pants. These were mercifully black, _not_ pink with ducks. Not that he ever had anything _else_ with pink ducks. He didn't! Really…

With that he collapsed on his bed, deeply asleep, with a t-shirt that he was about to put on dangling from his limp fingers.

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Ginny walked through the halls toward the Slytherin common room. Actually, she was walking toward the dungeons, since she had no clue where the Slytherin common room was exactly. As she was passing and especially dank and foul looking wall, a nearby painting decided to comment on her appearance. "What is a _Weasley_ of all people doing _here_?" it drawled in a voice much like Malfoy's would be if it aged about twenty years.

"Looking for the Slytherin common room, thank you very much." Who was this anyway? Probably a past Slytherin who contributed greatly…money-wise at least. No one but a Slytherin could be that rude…and think that being a Weasley was the worst thing in the world. Wait a second… "How did you know I'm a Weasley?"

"Oh please," he replied. "Red hair, hand-me-down robes, a cauldron full of freckles. Who else could it be?" The painting scoffed as if it was the clearly obvious. "You should leave here little girl, before you get hurt."

"Er…where is here anyway?"

"The Weasleys may have been poor excuses for wizards, but they were never stupid. What has this world come to?"

Ginny patiently waited while the painting moped about the stupidity of the current generation. Finally it replied, "You're just where you wanted to be. The Slytherin common room, " he said as he pointed to the vile wall. "But I doubt you can get in without the password." As his final words left his lips, he quietly slipped out of his painting.

She still didn't know who that man was. Then she caught sight of the label beneath the painting. '_Stupid.'_ How could she forget about that? She came close enough to read what it said. "Salazar Slytherin. Founder of one of the four Houses of Hogwarts."

"Oh joy. So I just had a nice chat with the long-dead lord of Slytherin. Just my luck."

Now to that wall. It seemed like an ordinary wall that oozed blood. Wait—What! Blood? Oh never mind…that was just slime. Ginny hesitantly put her hand on the wall, which was rather stupid actually, as she got a handful of slime, but at least it wasn't completely useless. At her touch the stones of the dungeon wall sprang apart to admit her. '_Must be something to do with the program,'_ she thought. Normally the wall would probably attack her or something.

As the stones parted a common room of green, black, and silver was revealed containing about twenty Slytherins of all ages. '_Good-bye world. I just hope they get me a nice coffin.'_

Amazingly enough as she inched to the door that led to the staircases, that led to the dormitories, she wasn't attacked. Just glared at from every direction. '_Well good enough.'_

As she got through the door to safety from those stares, she breathed a sigh of relief. But now where to go? So many floors! As she was contemplating whether to just go about yelling Draco's name, she felt as if an invisible hand had shoved her. She had definitely moved up the stairs a few steps.

Ginny kept walking until she reached the first floor. As she turned to go through the door, she felt the hand again, shoving her up higher. This continued on about five more times until she reached the sixth floor. The mysterious hand then shoved her into the sixth floor corridor and to a door with a morbid air around it.

'_Well this must be it.'_ Aloud she said, "Thank you invisible hand."

Out of seemingly nowhere came the voice of Salazar Slytherin. "You're quite welcome." With a last shove she was pushed into Draco's room.

The first thing she saw was black. And then more black. And after that some more black. And then a half-naked Draco on a black bed, dressed in loose black pants.

Whoah! Why was he half-naked? Why was he missing a shirt? Where _was_ his shirt? Why was Ginny thinking rather forbidden thoughts about a yummy Malfoy? And _why_ did she have a sudden urge to snog him senseless?

Ginny couldn't find answers to any of the questions, except the third one: his shirt was on the floor, and it was scaring her. So was her current fantasy of Malfoy and a bowl of lime gelatin.

Ginny shook her head viciously. '_NO! Control yourself. Malfoy bad. Harry good. Malfoy bad. Harry good. Remember that, good girl.'_ All her sudden urges were gone.

She set the paint can down at her feet and stared at Malfoy deciding what to do with him and his untidy, still dripping-wet hair that hung over his eyes, his bare chest, his well toned muscles, his—'_NO! Stop that.' _

As she stood there just standing and staring, one of her urges resurfaced. She _needed_ to tickle him. '_I mean, come on. Doesn't he just look so tickleable?'_

So it was decided. She would tickle him. Besides, Malfoy looked like one of those people that were like logs when they slept. Nothing could wake them up. Or maybe it could. Either way, she silently tiptoed up to his bed and knelt. As her hands gingerly touched his chest, there was a flash of movement.

Suddenly Ginny found herself pinned underneath a warm body, a cold hand clutching her wrist tightly, and staring at those steel-gray eyes. "As the Hogwart's motto says," he whispered coldly, "never tickle a sleeping dragon."

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1. Head witch – In this fanfic that's the term I use for the wizard version of a psychiatrist.

A/N: Hoped you liked this chapter! Sorry it takes so long to write. I try to make it good, and I don't have much time. Sorry. Tell me what you think.


	4. Of Seducing Blaise…and Not Succeeding

A/N: Fourth chapter! It seems that I end up writing about one chapter per month. Sorry people but that's the best I can do. I'm still grounded. I've passed eighth grade with flying colors, finally graduated, and am on to preparing for next years…gods no. This is my last chapter before the summer. I'm going to a hellhole without a computer. Sorry if this chapter seems a bit rushed.

**Disclaimer: **Yes I keep forgetting it…but I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters, contents, and so on.

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Chapter No. Four

Seducing Blaise…and Not Quite Succeeding

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_So it was decided. She would tickle him. Besides, Malfoy looked like one of those people that were like logs when they slept. Nothing could wake them up. Or maybe it could. Either way, she silently tiptoed up to his bed and knelt. As her hands gingerly touched his chest, there was a flash of movement. _

Suddenly Ginny found herself pinned underneath a warm body, a cold hand clutching her wrist tightly, and staring at those steel-gray eyes. "As the Hogwart's motto says," he whispered coldly, "never tickle a sleeping dragon."

"Now tell me Weasley," Draco continued, not loosening his grip one bit. "What the flying fuck are you doing?" ((A/N: Flying fuck. Sorry couldn't resist. Read it in another fic and have been using it ever since.))

"Er…um…" Ginny's mind was a barren wasteland as she stared at that oh-so-distracting chest, which was conveniently at eye level. Since her brain was currently out of action, her mouth said the best thing it could, "Painting?"

Draco raised an eyebrow, rendering Ginny's mouth useless as well, as it went dry. "Painting? I think not. I don't happen to see a brush in your hand. And unless my chest is the wall, then I'm positive you were doing something else."

"But I _was_ painting, that is until I got distracted." Ginny's hand was throbbing due to the cutoff in circulation. "Er, could you let go of my hand now?"

Draco considered this for a moment, but finally let go. As the blood rushed painfully into her hand, it turned from a nasty blue color, to an even nastier purple. Although he was no longer clutching her hand, he had not gotten off her. He was currently straddling her stomach in a way that induced many new, but equally exotic Draco fantasies. _No, no, no, no, no. I love Harry. I love Harry. I love Harry. I love Harry._

That got rid of them, so for the moment she could concentrate. As Draco cleared his throat, it became obvious that he had said something during her mental chanting and was waiting for her reply. "Excuse me? I didn't catch that."

Draco sighed and repeated himself. "I said, why aren't you at dinner?"

"Well why aren't you?" _Smooth, Ginny, smooth._

"Because it's none of your business."

"Same."

There followed a moment of awkward silence, before Draco spoke again. "Well you're not doing any painting tonight. I'm not sleeping with that stench. Shouldn't you be going back to your room now? And how did you get past the Slytherins without extensive injuries?"

" No idea, they just stared at me. And I would leave, but seeing as how I'm still pinned underneath your very heavy self, it seems slightly impossible." Ginny wriggled a bit to demonstrate her situation.

As soon as she squirmed underneath him, Draco jumped off her as if he was possessed by a demon, or a very naughty ghost, or a—well, he jumped quickly. But not quickly enough for Ginny not to feel a rather odd bulge forming.

Before she could blink, he had grabbed her and her cloak once again, and was shoving her out his door. "Goodnightdon'tcomebackagain," said Draco in one fast breath before he slammed the door.

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As the clock struck twelve, Pansy Parkinson silently slipped out of the Slytherin common room, and through the dungeon halls. She, unlike Draco Malfoy, was relying on her natural sneakiness, not some invisibility cloak, to get her to the Astronomy Tower unnoticed. So far, she was doing pretty well.

She glanced at the watch on her wrist. It now read five after twelve, and she was already at the tower. Wow, that was fast. She slipped through the heavy wooden door, and closed it silently. Pansy looked around, but saw no one.

"Too early? Trying to keep me in suspense? I understand." She took a seat on the windowsill across the room.

As she gazed out the window, she realized that it was a full moon tonight. Perfect for a romantic evening…when Draco came.

She got up and began pacing restlessly. Five more minutes and she was gone. Wild animal sex was fine and all, but sleep was nice too. "Why am I even here?"

"You're here waiting for me my dear, why else?" said Blaise as he came out of the shadows.

Pansy jumped off the windowsill hastily, and straightened her skirt, which had ridden up. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm your surprise of course."

"No you're not. Draco was coming up here to give me a surprise."  
"Draco is a bit tied up at the moment…literally, so he sent me as a replacement."

"No!"  
"Yes," said Blaise as he drew closer. "Besides, what does it matter who it is? As long as you get what you came for."

Pansy thought over this for a second. _Well…if Draco's not coming…his loss._ Pansy draped her arms over Blaise's shoulders without further ado. "Well Blasie-poo…"

_Oh god no, not me too, _thought Blaise.

"…What will we do tonight?"

"What do you think?"  
"Well…I think we're going to have a wonderful evening." Pansy winked slyly.

Blaise inwardly rolled his eyes. _Even though it's the middle of the night._

Pansy ran her finger over Blaise's jawbone. _But first I'll play with him a bit._

Cue the mental eye-roll. _Oh boy. I'm going to _kill_ Draco._

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Meanwhile the soon to be very dead Draco was sitting in an armchair in a desolate corner of the Slytherin common room. Normally anyone sitting in that corner could go unnoticed for weeks, but since Draco was psychotic and overly paranoid, he was covered by his invisibility cloak to ensure that detection was impossible.

He looked at the watch on his wrist impatiently. Half past twelve. Either Pansy was more persistent than he had thought, or Blaise had been unable to withstand her badgering and had died.

All of a sudden, the wall that served as a door to the common room opened up and a disheveled, tear-stained Pansy burst into the room. Her hysterical sobbing caused the heads of the few people in the common room to turn and stare.

"Oh it was horrible!" shrieked Pansy as she collapsed into the lap of her best friend Millicent Bulstrode.

"There, there…" murmured Millicent, patting Pansy's shoulder comfortingly. She turned to the others occupying the room. "What are you all staring at? Off to your rooms before I hurt you!" This cleared the room out. "Now what happened?" she said as she turned to Pansy.

"Oh Millie! He was horrible, absolutely vile!" She shuddered as if remembering. "I-I did _everything_, and I m-mean _everything_. I flirted as I never did before, b-but it's as if he's not even h-human!"

Here Millie had to wait until Pansy calmed down enough before she continued. "And then?" she prompted gently.

"He didn't react to anything I did!" whined Pansy.

As Pansy buried her face in Millie's shoulder, she rolled her eyes. Draco stifled a chuckle from where he sat. She probably thought Pansy was ridiculous as well.

Millicent sighed sympathetically and continued to pretend to care. Pansy was her friend after all. "You probably weren't his type, that's all."

"T-that's what he said. He said 'Sorry, girl's like you aren't my type.'" Pansy sniffled and rubbed her eyes, smearing her eyeliner further. "But that can't be right, I'm everyone's type."

"Come on." Millicent stood, taking Pansy with her. "Let's go up to bed and sleep a bit. You'll feel better in the morning, you'll see. There'll be other better guys," she said as she led Pansy through the door to the dorms.

"Not bloody likely," snorted Blaise from behind Draco's armchair.

Draco yelped and jumped, pretty startled if I may say so. His invisibility cloak slipped off and dropped to the floor. "What are you trying to do, give me a heart attack?"  
"If possible."  
"Well it's not," he said as he retrieved his cloak from the floor. "And how did you know I was there?"

"Well you see Draco love," said Blaise as he threw his arm over Draco's shoulder and dragged him along to the boy's dormitory door. "It's the way you smell. It's a distinct kind of smell. I can always tell no matter what you're wearing…or not wearing."

"And what exactly does _that_ mean?"

"Nothing absolutely nothing."

"Well anyway, that was brilliant. I never thought you'd get Pansy that upset."

"I didn't do much. Just introduced her to the wonderful world of rejection."

Draco glared at Blaise, "It wouldn't hurt if you occasionally visited that magnificent place yourself. Merlin knows your ego needs deflating."

"Why thank you Draco, I know I'm sexy."

"That's not what I said you git. You hear only what you want to, don't you."

"Of course I do," agreed Blaise. "and you know you meant it."

"Did not." Draco scowled.

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did too."  
"We sound like five years olds. Stop it."

"You stop it." Said Blaise as they ascended the stairs to their appropriate rooms.

"No you."

"You."

"Oh Merlin!"

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A shape gently wrenched the hangings around Ginny's bed apart. It slowly crawled onto her bed and edged toward her face.

Ginny sighed, still deep in her dream, as she felt the balance on the mattress disturbed. She giggled as she felt a soft tongue trace patterns along her cheek. "Draco…stop it," she muttered faintly.

Ginny's eyes sprang open as she realized what she had said aloud. In a moment of panic, she scrambled away from the shape until she realized it was just a tad bit too small to be Draco Malfoy. In fact, it was a bit too small to even be human. After another moment's pause as Ginny fully awoke, she realized that the shape was actually Crookshanks, not the Draco Malfoy she had dreamed of. _Wait, what? I did _not_ dream about Draco._

_Yes you did._

_No I didn't!  
Oh stop denying it. You know you did. And I know too. I know everything in your head. I know how you dreamed of him. I know how you want to—_

_Okay that enough! And since when do I talk to myself?_

_Since now._

Ginny groaned and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. Another beautiful morning, all sarcasm intended.

As Ginny dressed for the day, she was in fact busy mentally stabbing Draco Malfoy for ever existing. _Why does he have to make my life such hell? I'll have to go over to paint today. And that goodbye yesterday was so odd…_

Ginny dragged through yet another uneventful day, going about her tasks in a mindless way, seeing as how she spent most of her time daydreaming about nothing in particular. So, yet again, we find Ginny in potions waiting for Professor Snape to dismiss the class to dinner. _Release us you barmy old codger before I decide to chop off your extremely wrinkly private bits, and stir them into my potion._

As Ginny let her potion simmer, she realized that the room was deathly silent and everyone was staring at her, with mouths wide open. Ginny looked over at Snape and saw that he was apoplectic. And then something hit her. "Whoops…did I say that out loud?"

"You did indeed miss Weasley. Detention after dinner. Be on time." He turned and stalked back to his desk. "All of you pour a sample of your potion into vials and cork them. As soon as you're done you may leave."

As soon as she was safely out of the dungeons, Ginny sighed in relief. At least he didn't murder her…yet. _What is it with me and saying things when I don't want to? Well at least no painting and no Draco tonight. _

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Unfortunately Ginny was quite wrong. As she stepped into her potions classroom for her detention, she was shocked to see a shape with platinum blonde hair, cleaning the insanely dirty dungeon floor the muggle way.

"About time miss Weasley you're late. Pick up a sponge and join Mr. Malfoy." Snape picked a pile of books from his table and headed for the door. "I'll be leaving you now. When you're done with the floor you may go on to washing all the cauldrons and desks. You are not to leave until I come back. When I do come back everything better be spotless. Now stop gaping at me and get to cleaning, both of you! Have a nice evening." At this, he spun on his heels and exited the room.

Ginny hung her cloak on a hook by Draco's and picked up a sponge. She dipped it into the bucket already filled with incredibly dirty water and got down to scrub.

"Glad you took your time getting here."

Ginny said nothing. She had decided the best and safest tactic was just to ignore him. That way she wouldn't accidentally shag—er kill him.

"I hate detentions with Snape. He always makes you clean _something_," he continued conversationally. "So what did you do to end up here?"

_Ignore. Just ignore. He'll stop babbling soon enough._

"I spilled my cauldron of Shrinking potion on his lap. Just imagine the effects that had."

_Must. Not. Maim._

"What did you do?" He asked, not planning to stop talking anytime soon. "Blow up your potion? Burn a hole through the cauldron? Dance naked around the room?"

_Okay that's it. Anything to get you to shut up._ "Well actually, I called him a barmy old codger, insulted the bits that you had previously spilled your potion on, and threatened to chop them off."

"Er…okay then." Maybe it was just Ginny imagination, but she thought that the fearless Draco Malfoy had slowly inched away from her, and at the same time covertly covering his crotch with the spounge.

After that the detention was silent and went fairly quickly. When Snape arrived about four hours later, they were both exhausted and wishing they had no arms to feel. The two of them gladly ran off to their proper common rooms to drop off to blissful sleep.

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A/N: That was a bit short but oh well. Next chapter will be better, although will come out sometime in September at the earliest. I've preordered HBP so I'm happy. x3 Please tell me what you think of this chapter.


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